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Positions for Hot Sex That Work Better With a Spreader Bar

Spreader bars are simple, seductive, and have the potential to improve sex. These sultry poses are certain to get your heart racing.

Have you ever come across a spreader bar? A “spreader bar” is a metal bar that goes across limbs to “spread” them apart, exactly as it sounds. This bondage equipment features either built-in cuffs or connection points where you may attach your shackles. The bar not only spreads the limbs apart but also remains between them, making it impossible to shut the limbs after the spreader bar is installed.

Spreader bars are often worn on the ankles to spread the legs apart, although they can also be worn on the wrists. (The appearance of a secretary completing her everyday work with her wrists spread on each side of her body has been popularized by several BDSM films!)

Spreader bars may be used in more imaginative ways after you enter specialized bondage societies, such as between a collar and a wrist, or between a wrist and an ankle. There are even short spreader bars for thigh-to-thigh spreading.

Your imagination is the limit with a modular spreader bar (a bar with many tie points). What sex position do you want to attain, and how might a spreader bar make you feel more connected while you’re doing it?

Since you’re here seeking spreader bar sex positions, I’m sure you can already see how seductive spreader bars can be. They not only provide the wearer of the spreader bar a sense of bonding and vulnerability, but they also leave numerous locations “open for access,” such as the area between the thighs where most people enjoy playing.

Spreader Bar Safety Fundamentals

Using spreader bars while laying down is a low-risk bondage practice in the BDSM world, presuming you’re using a pre-made set that’s been developed for sex. (Some DIY versions may not have the same level of safety certification.)

Basic safety standards apply to all kinds of bondage. In the event of an emergency, make sure you know how to get your partner out of the spreader bar quickly. Panic attacks, breathing difficulties, or just plain leg cramps are all reasons to desire your spouse out of their bondage as soon as possible. Make sure you understand how your spreader bar works – and how to get them out quickly if something goes wrong. (Fortunately, most spreader bars use a clipping mechanism, so removing a person is as simple as unclipping a cuff – but make sure the cuff isn’t under stress first!)

Before you begin, you should also talk about safe terms with your partner. Safewords are strange, unrelated-to-sex terms that suggest that something is extremely wrong – and you aren’t simply pretending anguish – since kink may frequently incorporate roleplay and “I’m being coerced into pleasure!” dynamics. While screaming “No, please don’t!” during roleplay (when you don’t truly want them to stop!) might be amusing, yelling “yellow banana!” can indicate that something is wrong.

Use a safe gesture (carrying cash or a pair of keys to drop or toss, for example) instead of a word if wearing a gag or otherwise limiting verbal communication is part of your bondage enjoyment.

Talk to your spouse about safety and make sure you’re both on the same page. Having a strategy ensures that both partners are on the same page with clear communication – and even if you have a safe word, you should check in with each other frequently to verify that everything is going well. Safewords aren’t a replacement for excellent communication; they’re just another tool for making sure it’s as clear as possible.

When the person “wearing” the spreader bar walks, new safety considerations arise. Most importantly, make sure you have a strategy in place in case you fall. While a person strolling about with their hands bound in a spreader bar to serve your coffee may seem appealing, it also poses a unique challenge: if they fall, they have no means to brace themselves or defend themselves. Make sure you prepare ahead for this – and do everything you can to reduce the danger. (No high heels, clean paths, no obstructive accessories, etc.)

Don’t forget to factor in weariness. It’s conceivable for limbs to become fatigued – or even fall asleep – as the blood drains from the limbs, especially if this spreader bar is worn for longer than intercourse. Keep this in mind, maintain open communication with your partner, and be open to changing positions as needed to ensure you’re both present – rather than focusing on how tingling your fingers feel.

Sex Positions on the Spreader Bar

You now have all of the required safety measures in place. Let’s get to the meat of the matter: all of the sexiest ways to employ a spreader bar in the bedroom.

The Fundamental Y Position

Almost everyone remembers trying the Basic Y position with their spreader bar for the first time. It’s simple, comfy, and a terrific way to get a sense of how wearing a spreader bar feels. (This spreader bar sex position is also ideal for self-bondage for a lot of folks.) While alone, most persons can reach their ankles and connect a spreader bar.)

The Basic Y position is also a convenient way to connect the spreader bar, and many individuals will go into the “Basic Y” to do so before returning to the sex position seen in the article’s header image.

Simply sit down wherever you’re most comfortable, extend your feet, and secure the spreader bar and shackles around your ankles. That concludes our discussion.

Position of the Standing Bar

Nobody says you have to play all of your spreader bar games while the individual is lying down! The Standing Bar Position, on the other hand, makes use of the spreader bar to stretch the bound person’s ankles wide. You can truly modify the “spread” of the person’s ankles with an adjustable spreader bar, but if you have a spreader bar without modifications, be sure your partner’s legs can spread as wide as the length of the bar. (Due to differences in height, flexibility, and strength, everyone’s capacity to spread varies!)

Make sure you’ve accounted for any balance loss, especially if you’re planning to do anything to the tied person that could move their body about (like a spanking!) as we indicated in our safety blurb. Allowing the individual to lean forward and hold a stable item (such as a countertop) to maintain balance can assist prevent falls.

Alternatively, if you truly want your bound spouse to stand tall in their spreader bar bondage, set this scenario next to the bed with the activity’s momentum in mind, so they may fall onto the soft, fluffy surface if they lose their balance.

This position may also be perfect for solo play if you remember to follow the safety guidelines. There’s something seductive about masturbating in such an exposed posture.

Position: Behind-the-Back

Spreader bars aren’t just for the ankles; they may also be utilized to strengthen the wrists. Place the spreader bar behind the person’s back, their wrists near their shoulders, and the cuffs around their wrists. This will keep the tied person’s hands up by their shoulders and prevent them from placing them down.

This posture might feel quite vulnerable, especially for women with breasts. Pulling the wrists close to the shoulders – especially if the individual tries to relieve the stress of the spreader bar pressing against their back – causes the person’s chest to protrude forward. This spreader bar’s placement on the back prevents practically all mobility, which can be highly appealing to people who enjoy this form of restriction.

This position is known as “Server’s Hand” in rope bondage because it closely simulates food service, with a tray slung over the shoulder. Combining this Behind-the-Back Spreader Bar posture with some service submission might be a fascinating way to experiment with the position.

Keep in mind that if the person is sitting upright, this will be a temporary spreader bar position. Consider how soon you get “pins and needles” feelings when your arms are pointed to the sky – that’s roughly how long you have to appreciate whatever you’re doing before moving. If you opt to change this posture by allowing the bound individual to lie down on their chest, as long as the elbows are not at an excessive angle, more blood will likely reach the hands. Keep in mind that many people may find lying on their backs unpleasant due to the positioning of the bar.

If you prefer to have your spouse wander about while in this bondage position, keep in mind our safety guidelines. They won’t be able to “catch” themselves, and you’ll probably mess with their normal sense of balance, making it easier for them to fall. If you’re going to take your bondage mobile, have a strategy ahead of time.

The X Position in the Vertical

Something about witnessing someone’s hands helplessly chained above their head affects a lot of people, both bondage users, and bondage spectators. This is taken advantage of by the Vertical X Position.

You may rapidly restrict the wrists above the head by suspending the spreader bar from any robust overhead point. Not only does this make you feel exposed since your entire body is on the show (with no ability to “cover-up”). Because the limbs are generally out of the way, practically any sexual activity may be performed in the Vertical X Position, which is one of the reasons it is so popular among kink societies.

Make sure you understand that the Vertical X Position, like other above-the-head locations, has a finite lifespan. The lack of blood flow caused by the wrists’ posture will cause pins and needles in most people’s arms.

Before employing a weight-bearing spreader bar position like this, make sure your spreader bar is intended to sustain weight. You could grant it a “pass” during a test for support, but in real life, when a person becomes tired from standing or activity – or even when their knees collapse with pleasure – the bound person will lean forward. This places a lot of strain on the spreader bar, which helps support some of the bound person’s weight.

Kneel the individual as illustrated in the figure above to relieve some of the weight. This guarantees that only their upper body weight can pull on the spreader bar, while their legs support and balance them.

Don’t forget to check the suspension point, too. If you hang a human being on a ceiling hook designed for a potted plant, it’s likely to fall – and on top of the bound person’s head (really, that’s no fun). Make sure any bondage points you use are properly put, and if you plan on performing this type of bonding frequently, get a professional and tell them you need it for a “floating egg chair.”

One bar position, four points

Four bondage points are integrated straight into the bondage bar on some spreader bars. This enables the attachment of four kinky restraints instead of the typical two, allowing for additional bonding possibilities. With the Four Points, One Bar Position, you may easily produce a hog-tie-like position if you have a particular spreader bar that enables it.

You’ll want the tied individual to lie down on their stomach to get into the shown Four Points, One Bar Position. Clip both ankle cuffs into the spreader bar after that. After that, the tied individual can reach back and place their wrists in the spreader bar.

This posture necessitates the flexibility of the bound individual for them to stretch their wrists to the same plane as their ankles. For many people, this may be a challenge (at best) or downright impossible. However, there’s no need for you to give up the job! Simply add a second spreader bar – one for the ankles and one for the wrists – and you’ll be in the same position!

Hogtie positions (like this one!) are known for making it difficult to breathe for those who can attain them. Because you’re pulling the person’s arms back and putting all of their weight on their chest and stomach (a.k.a. the breathing area), it might be challenging to maintain up with oxygen demands – on top of the strain of the posture. Make sure you communicate frequently – and keep in mind that this role has a finite duration. You can easily unclip the ankles or wrists to make it more comfortable – and keep enjoying the pleasure you were having before.

Position of Leapfrog Bondage

Having the bound person on their knees is another option to modify the Four Points, One Bar posture. The ankles are then shackled using the spreader bar. The bound individual places their entire weight on their knees and extends their arms between their wide legs to place their wrists near the spreader bar. The spreader bar may then be fastened to the wrist cuffs, thus locking the individual in place.

Because this position places a lot of pressure on the bound person’s chest and face, I recommend utilizing cushions or other position aids to keep them comfortable and breathing comfortably. While a mouth gag may be added to the position as indicated in the figure, I recommend trying it a few times without it first to verify the bound person can breathe normally and convey any pain.

The Four Points, One Bar Position is a standing position with four points and one bar.

Are you up for a new challenge? This is without a doubt the most difficult – and deadly – job on the list. It not only necessitates a high level of balance, but it also eliminates the bound person’s ability to catch themselves if they topple over. It’s essentially yoga, but on a more difficult level.

Allow the tied individual to stand with their ankles stretched apart to do the Standing Four Points, One Bar Position. An adjustable spreader bar will allow you to adjust the spreader bar to your partner’s most comfortable, customary standing position for the most secure starting point. After the ankles have been tied into the spreader bar, the individual leans down to reach their wrists, which may also be bound into the spreader bar.

You may simply tie the wrists together with cuffs and link it to the spreader bar with a bondage tether if the bound individual is unable to comfortably stretch their wrists to their feet. There are always methods to make bonding fit a person’s specific requirements!

The tied partner’s sense of powerlessness might be amplified in this posture. Not only will they have to be concentrated on maintaining their equilibrium, but moving away or moving the body away from any form of contact or feeling will be nearly difficult. This might make them feel extremely vulnerable – and “at the mercy” of their partner. The bulk of the genital area is still open for play, and it’s still extremely easy to hold the bound person’s hair or face.

The greatest hazard in this posture, as you might expect, is if the individual falls. Because there is no way to brace themselves, the individual may simply fall on their head, which is a huge no-no. To avoid this, don’t do this posture with someone who isn’t exceptionally steady, and avoid any possible balance-destroyers like heels, tiredness, or alcohol completely.

You might have the person stand up against the bed to assist stabilize the position. While they may need to bend their arms to make this comfortable, depending on the height of the bed, the person may be able to rest their upper chest and head on the bed, giving them something to lean against and preventing them from tumbling.

You might also have the individual who is shackled lean against a wall. You can obtain all of the wonderful access of the sex position while giving some stability for the bound person by having a person perpendicular to the wall (with one of their sides making complete contact with the wall), exciting access to the sex position. Use each of those tactics, together with a piece of furniture shoved against the wall, to give this kinky sex position the maximum stability imaginable.

If you wish to make this position safer, use verbal bondage to tell the bound person to keep their wrists close to the spreader bar, rather than binding the wrists to the bar. This gives the individual an easy method to catch themselves if they tip, but it also gives you a reason to “penalize” them if they are careless (impact toys like riding crops can be a great prop that can offer a quick “punishment” if the captive moves).

The X Position in Advanced

Do you have a pair of spreader bars? We’ve got a solution for you!

Why limit yourself to only tying the ankles or wrists when you can tie them both? They’re made feasible by two spreader bars.

Instruct the bondage to assume the Basic Y posture. After you’ve attached a spreader bar to your ankles, add one to your wrists. That’s all there is to it! For a lot of pleasure, the bound individual can then lie on their back – or stay sitting.

The Inverted X Position is a position in which the X is inverted.

Flip the “Advanced X Position” on its head so the individual is on their hands and knees. Not only does this make the entire butt available, but it also makes everything between the thighs more accessible.

Most individuals aren’t accustomed to being on their hands and knees, with their wrists and ankles splayed wide apart. Although an adjustable spreader bar (on its lowest spread settings) will assist relieve some of the tension, most people will not be able to keep this posture for lengthy amounts of time.

Fortunately, the Inverted X can simply be converted to a more comfortable laying-down position. Simply assist the bound individual in lying face-down on their stomach with their arms raised above them and their legs flat behind them, similar to a “spread-eagle” posture.